Tags

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

After being several months studying in the States, I believe I  found the key to master the language of Shakespeare, well, or at least, its Americanised version.Yes ladies and gentlemen, I found the Holy Grail, the key to endless conversations in the mother tongue of the Simpsons.

First of all, you should know that to achieve the juicy promise I stated above,  there are three words that you must learn to break through the Wild Wild West and the not apparently so, Wild East coast of the United States of America.

Before I tell you which words, I believe you should thank me, this is precious information that none of the English Academies divulge so they can have you hooked between their nets for years and years, while you get desperate and your assassin levels start rising to a new whole point. I reiterate, credit where credit is due.

Ok, this is what you have been waiting after skipping the rantings above. Wait for it. These are the magical words:

– Cute.

– Cool.

– Awesome.

Yes! Now, I am going to use a series of examples in which it is demonstrated how to use them correctly.

1) For example, the pretty girl from your office finally agrees, after harassing her for weeks begging and stalking,  to a date. You tell your mates, and this is what they will answer : – Wow dude, that´s awesome, she is so cute!  *** Pay attention that dude, is another word extremely favoured by the American menfolk.

2)You win the lottery, you tell your best friend, he answers: – That´s so cool man!.  *** Pay attention that man, is also another word extremely favoured by the American menfolk.

3) The guy from your dreams says hello to you when you cross gazes with him in the cafeteria and you tell your friends : – (sigh) he is so cool!.

 *** Pay attention that both three words can be used in a wide range of situations applied to a wide range of objects, things and beings. Guys, girls,dogs, babies, dogs can be cute.  Guys, girls, food,dogs,films, books can be awesome.  You, me, him/her, us, they, can be cool; and most important, I can be referred as cute, cool and awesome, all in the same sentence!

Advertisements